Trusting God as Provider When He Gives You a Choice
Today's testimony is brought to you by our Heavenly Father.
Recently, I shared about a brother of mine calling and giving me a word about possibly going back to work. This really excited me because I've worked my whole life and, for the most part, enjoyed what I do. After spending quite a while seeking answers and seeking the Lord, my searching turned into a joyful time with my Father. I felt at peace even though I didn't get any confirmation or answers.
Not long after that, the Lord blessed me with another call from that brother, and he said that he felt the Lord was going to give me a choice. The Lord confirmed that right away. After thinking about this and pondering all of my past choices and present opportunities, I made a choice.
I've been here before.
I vividly remember a couple of times when the Lord blessed me by allowing me to make a choice. I think it's important to clarify that, obviously, in all we do there is a choice—a decision we make about whether to obey or not. But in these particular situations, I believe the Lord was allowing me to choose the path, and He would bless the choice I made.
I look at this kind of choice as a gift.
I had that with quitting my job and deciding to be self-employed, and I had that with opening a repair shop, just to name a couple of big ones. I see now that the Lord was testing me to see what I would choose while also using those choices to prepare me for the decision I would need to make now.
When the Lord says, "go on your own strength," I believe He is expecting me to use the wisdom and understanding He's given me to make the best possible decision.
In the past, I've felt this overwhelming need to be the provider, and it weighed heavily on the decisions I made. I see now that I was always going to pick what looked like it would provide—what would make the most money—for my family.
So naturally, I chose to be self-employed because I could make more money without a boss in the way. Naturally, I chose to open my own shop because the opportunity to expand was great.
The Lord brought me through each of those situations, and the wisdom I have now has changed me.
I've learned that trusting God as provider doesn't mean ignoring my responsibilities. It means recognizing that ultimately, provision has always come from Him.
After a couple of days of prayer and pondering, I have chosen to be with my family and focus on ministry over working for money.
I would be a liar if I didn't confess that I'm nervous. But my faith that God will continue to do what He's always done is my rock. This decision is another opportunity for trusting God as provider, even when I can't see exactly what His provision will look like.
In the times when fear creeps in, the Lord fills me with peace by showing me that all those past decisions worked out for good. God always provided, and He even used my weakness of chasing what I thought was right to give me the wisdom and understanding I needed for this moment.
Looking back, I can see that He wasn't wasting any of it.
The jobs. The business. The opportunities. The choices. Even the mistakes.
He was teaching me.
And now He's given me another choice.
This time, I'm choosing differently.
Thank you, Father, for one more day. Amen.
